Greetings on this stormy, cold winter Sunday morning. I trust you’re doing well, and staying warm. We are looking at another full day of high winds and snow accumulations of 5 more inches – of course it’s not accumulating here, it’s blowing into the next several towns thanks to the 29 mph winds! Just up the hill five minutes away my daughter is enjoying peaceful snowfall. Last check they had about a foot of snow, and it’s still falling. We are not surprised by this, after all, our summer had record breaking heat, the fall brought on record breaking floods, so here we are…record breaking temps for winter at 10 degrees with a real feel of negative 8. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen it quiet like this, Joe recalls it being this cold sometime in the early 80’s. Our weather station that is connected to Weatherunderground is a bit messed up due to the wind gage being stuck. It happened before it got this cold, so we aren’t sure what the deal is, but the temps seem to be reading correctly.

In any case, the cat and dogs are getting a bit cabin fever’ish. I’m thankful it’s here when most people are on vacation, we are snuggled in & cozy in the house. Joe built this house with these kinds of storms in mind, he’s lived here 48 years, they’ve seen some really sever weather, and have lost power for weeks at a time. I think we might take a walk later today when it’s a bit lighter out, check out the place and see if anything needs putting away, this didn’t come unexpectedly, so we were prepared as far as picking things up and battening down the hatches, but just in case we will do a walk about. I’m sure the pups would be more than happy to take a little adventure. Unfortunately, Joe has ended up with a cold. Yes, we are sure it’s the cold that everyone and their baby had at the beginning of break. My daughter, the grandkids, my aunt, cousin and her son…yuck! I’m going to guess it will be knocking on my door step soon enough, probably just in time to go back to work…ugg!!

Speaking of work and getting sick….there’s been a few things going on!

I’ve thought about blogging for several weeks, lots going through my head, but things have been so incredibly busy that I haven’t had time, until now. The holiday has come and gone, in it’s place has left me feeling a bit more peaceful than at the start of the holiday break. I will break it down with headers, so if you want to skip to the parts that interest you…it will make it easier.

A quick visit to the ER….for me this time….

I was minding my own business…driving to work….like any typical weekday when my jaw starting hurting. A very strange, new to me pain…so I decided to call Joe and tell him about it. That morning at breakfast I had a bit of a dizzy spell, which isn’t unusual for me since my blood pressure tends to run a bit low. When we were chatting I was talking about my pain in my neck and shoulder, when I mentioned the pain in my jaw he got super serious and asked which side….apparently pain in the left side is indicative of a heart attack. I knew the arm was a sign, but the jaw, neck and shoulder? Anyhow, after a call to the 24 hour nurse help line, Joe dragging me to the hospital, a quick EKG in the ER just to be sure I wasn’t dying, I was back home that afternoon to rest.

I’ve been to the cardiologist., expressed the absurdity of it all…. only being 47 and being perfectly healthy at the cardiologist for no reason….but apparently since my mom had a heart attack at 55, I’m considered high risk. I’ve had a stress test that was uneventful, and have an angiogram scheduled for tomorrow – if the weather behaves?! It will be okay…it was probably stress…which you will read more about below….

Work & Direct Covid Exposure…..

I received a phone call Sunday the 12th telling me I had been directly exposed to Covid, via an adult who had been vaccinated. I was told I couldn’t go back to work like everyone else and do a test to stay because I was unvaccinated. How does that make any sense at all? If I got it from someone who was vaccinated, and I’m well enough to work, but they make me stay home? Unfortunately, the vaccinated adult that exposed me, is super sick and not doing super well. It’s really sad.

I should be thrilled that I ended up with an extra week of vacation, and honestly I am, because holy smokes, I have been so busy that I hadn’t even begun to decorate for Christmas, or take down the very sparse decorations I put up for Autumn.

I’m not going to lie, it’s been a tough school year for me. I’m struggling with being away from home for 8 and a half hours, and being at one school in the classroom for five hours. I’m struggling with the corporation that I work for, the backwards politics, and the game playing of people being two-faced. I’m struggling with just wanting to do my job, and people being fake….it’s been really tough to accept all of this.

With being away for so long from home, I’m tired when I get home, taking care of things around here, and any hobby that I want to pursue is put on the back burner. I’m well aware I’m being a whiner, and I’m living most people’s lives, but it’s been difficult for me. It’s new to me, and getting into the stride of things has put a toll on my mental health. On to the next topic…

Mental Health…

With things being so difficult to accept at work, the holiday season quickly upon us, I was a bit out of sorts.

I’ve had an on going radio station in my head, constant noise, like standing in a crowded cafeteria with a ton of different conversations going on at once, and Christmas music blaring in the background.

I didn’t realize this was the case until I heard something on an episode of Cat Fish I was watching, where a young lady was chatting about a constant dialogue going on in her head. It’s extremely exhausting to listen to multiple conversations throughout the day while trying to work, the constant noise has a way of dragging a person down.

I was waking up every two hours, not sure why, but wide awake, often times I could get back to sleep, but it was fitful for the entire night. How frustrating, to have this going on when I could be getting lots of extra sleep thanks to the vacation, but no….there I was struggling with lack of sleep.

I was also able to identify why I was picking up my phone so often, scrolling through my Insta-feed, trying to silence the noise, but it was only adding to it after I put my phone down

I have a saying, that I use often with any person I meet – “Monsters only live in the dark”. When I finally had this epiphany about the ongoing noise in my head, I decided to let my monster out and chat about it with Joe. Being married to a guy who has a minor in phycology is helpful in many ways.

With the monster out in the daylight, and some tools to try to get things straightened out, I commenced to the new routine just two days ago, and it seems to be helping. Not picking up my phone so close to bed time, being mindful of the steps to going to bed, being in the moment, brushing my teeth, thinking about a good nights sleep, not all the stuff I didn’t get done, not all the stuff I need to do the next day, but really being present in the moment has helped a great deal. I’m sure that with the stress of the holiday being behind us is also helpful….which brings me to the next topic…

Holiday Season….

It was a delightful holiday season, no more stressful than any other, other than the constant noise in my head. My children had decided they didn’t want a big fuss about Christmas, so we decided on pizza, pastry, games and gifts a week prior to Christmas. Thank goodness for that too – the snow and freezing temps put a damper on much travel or get togethers for anyone, so it was nice to have things all finished and wrapped up early.

I know I say stressful, it’s not bad stress, and it’s not stress that is undue. It’s good to have some pressure – I like to decorate, bake and host, it brings me happiness, but with it also a bit of stress, but it’s not bad stress. I did tone things down a bit with having the entire family over, it was just mom and the kids for the early Christmas, holiday treat delivery Christmas eve, the in-laws for Christmas goose dinner last night, and a nice quiet day today.

Lily-Bean ended up coming over yesterday because mom and dad wanted to play in the snow, and Lily-Bean is too little to go out for very long in it. So, it was a nice Christmas surprise to have cuddles with her for a bit. Sadly, Papa Joe didn’t get to snuggle because he has a snotty nose and yucky cough…but he did get some really good giggles and goofy faces made to him from across the living room.

Mom….

Surprisingly, and most certainly thankfully Mom’s health is great. She had a second CT scan to check on the shadows on her lungs, and the doctor still seems mystified as to how well mom is doing. The spots have not grown, but they do not make sense to the pulmonary doctor. I really don’t care if they make sense to her or not, mom is doing well, and I will gladly accept that!

Flower Farm

I ended up changing my order from the wholesaler, I’ve lowered it to only 1,000 plugs, 100 of them being houseplants. Obviously the kids don’t need that many, so I need to figure out what to do with all the others! I’m still trying to wrap my brain around how this will all work out, but I’m sure by March there will be more light outside, I will have more energy, and I will have settled into work a bit better, they aren’t super high maintenance plants, I will be able to take care of them. My favorite seed catalog showed up finally, not that I need more seed, but there might be something in there that I might enjoy! I have over 70 daffodil and tulip bulbs that need to go in the ground, but….haven’t made it happen yet. I’m not worried…it will all work out just fine. It always does, and even if it doesn’t, what’s the worst that’s going to happen? The bulbs go bad, I survive to see another day…it will all be okay.

Clay…

My newest obsession! I’ve certainly been enjoying trying new things! My kiln arrived three months early, Baby Egan is tucked away in the garage still in his box. We have to do some rewiring of the breaker box, which we need parts and time to take care of, so that might take a bit of time. I’m putting my first firing date in February sometime, if it’s earlier, than it will be a nice surprise! It’s 22 degrees in the garage right now, so there will be no mud slinging or kiln running any time soon. Everyone was very excited about their handmade pottery gifts I made them for Christmas. My daughter and daughter-in-law both asked me if I made theirs…being impressed with my good looking feet lol…they have listen to me lament about my heavy bottomed pots and my sloppy feet for a while now. My daughter-in-law decorated an apron for me with a cute saying “Caution: I’ve been known to throw things” with a bunch of clay pots on it and it even had my new insta-handle on it – Authentic Creations by Jade. It was a very thoughtful gift!

I made something for my son that didn’t turn out at all, but I gave it to him anyhow, if I get up and get moving today, I will gladly try again. I ended up getting some really cool underglaze transfers that I will put on a plate and mug for him for his birthday in March.

I will also be working on a few prototypes of wall pockets I want to make for a friend of mine’s grief group – if they do not use them, I want to be able to sell them, so there’s some learning to be done there. I also want to make a few more cute little trinket dishes for my friends antique store, she’s having a little something in the spring.

Once the weather warms up, I will start to throw a few pots to put some house plants in, sell some of those plugs with one-of-a-kind pots! We shall see how it goes. Hopefully, not more heart issues, hopefully no other issues, just march on through the school year and get out the other side in one piece. I just need to take a different stance, and figure it out.

Thank you so much for dropping in. There have been several people mentioning my blog via email, text, even a Christmas card…..thank you for checking in on all of this craziness! Don’t hesitate to drop me a note to let me know you are doing well also! Until next time my friends, hugs to you!